Two Years of SoCal Adventures

Southern California is a land full of dreams and adventures. For the past two years, I’ve experienced so much more than I could have hoped for when I moved here. I lived at the beach, I explored SoCal and its neighbors, I became an expert OC foodie, I worked hard and played hard, and I spent time with amazing people. As a farewell to SoCal, I concocted a manual for thriving in this beautiful place.

1. Take Advantage of the local attractions.

Many of my friends and relatives who came to visit said they couldn’t live here because it was too “vacation-y.” I loved it though. My favorite aspect of living in Newport Beach was, by far, being so close to the beach. I went on countless walks and runs on Balboa Island and the beaches. I attended baseball games of all the SoCal MLB teams; I rented duffies and yachts with friends and family; I watched the Balboa Island Christmas boat parades. I put up with the LA traffic enough to hit up most of its corners;

the Rain Room and Rodeo Drive are the “can’t miss” attractions in my opinion. Disneyland is, as expected, more than magical. Watching the whales play and splash around the beaches is one of the sites you can’t miss but you won’t experience until you stop trying to find them. The shopping is some of the best out there, even for someone like me who doesn’t like shopping. Fashion Island and the Grove were probably my top two. Ultimately though, my balcony was the true pìece de résistance in California – the place where I easily spent the most time (aside from my bed and perhaps my office). 

2. You must drive everywhere – so take advantage of that car and get away for the weekends.

Driving is the biggest disadvantage to living here, but it’s the only way to get around. The traffic is as bad as people say it is. I actually had decent traffic luck for a while, but when that ran out, it was brutal. That said, there are so many places to drive to that are easy road trips and make you happy you have your car. Mexico was probably one of my favorite road trips. It was most exciting because so many people tried to tell me not to go, of course. What a fun-filled weekend, in a beautiful place, for the best priced trip I had during my whole time here. Phoenix and Scottsdale have to make the list, though of course enjoying the Phoenician’s luxury accommodations played a major role in that. They say, “what happens in Vegas” for a reason. It’s a city of sensory overload, but it’s also full of glitz, glam, and fun.

Then, even if I flew there, San Francisco, Seattle and Portland cannot be missed – all cities with their own character and colors and foodie scenes to make the flights all worthwhile. Last, but certainly not least would be the National Parks. I made it to five of them in the past two years – Arches, Grand Canyon, Joshua Tree, Bryce, and Zion. Each charmed and enchanted me in indescribable ways. Zion has been my favorite so far – it was majestic and imposing in a way that makes it effortlessly seep into your daydreams.

3. Explore all the best beach cities and towns to pick your favorite.

There can’t be any doubt as to my favorite of the beach towns – Newport. But, man-oh-man do they each have their own personalities and vibes. Some of my favorites from north to south include Santa Barbara, Malibu, Santa Monica, HB, Laguna, Del Mar, La Jolla, and the other SD beaches. Santa Barbara is such an adorable beach city, and when you accompany beach with wine tasting (Central Coast wineries are all within a stone’s throw) you cannot go wrong. Malibu is harder to reach; so it’s not as crowded but has those “unreal” views. Plus, when you have your Milano family along for the ride like I did the first Malibu visit, it’s bound to be chock full of “ohs” and “ahs.” Santa Monica – by far one of the best areas of LA – has the pier with the rides and the 2^nd street promenade that make it feel like the “city-est” of all the beach towns. Long Beach has such an eclectic style that you can’t pass it by. Its nightlife scene is pretty fun too – especially if you’re looking for a margarita tour. Huntington Beach cannot disappoint either.

It’s one of the most chill beach towns of them all, but what else would you expect from Surf City USA? HB is the town that first welcomed me to OC, and it’s where I first fell in love with my early morning beach runs, where the surfers and I were alone with dawn and the big blue. Laguna, Del Mar and La Jolla all have that luxury SoCal beach vibe – and rightly so. Del Mar is my favorite after Newps, but kayaking and sea lion gazing (not smelling) at La Jolla comes in pretty close after that. Then south but certainly not last would be the other beach towns of SD – OB, PB, Sunset Cliffs, and Coronado. All have their own charms and certainly add to the true San Diego nickname “America’s Finest City.”

4. Adapt a healthy lifestyle.

Running is my favorite hobby, and luck for me, it’s a healthy one. One of the reasons I wanted to move to SoCal was for its active lifestyle. If you love running like I do, SoCal is a dream come true, unless if you’re a crazy runner who somehow enjoys the sensation of your lungs freezing when you run in cold weather. Beach runs, runs around Balboa Island, Back Bay, or through Crystal Cove all had me sweating my heart out, letting my mind wander, and all while enjoying breath-taking views. You can’t beat exercising year-round, especially when you’re training for your next race. I trained hard and pushed my limits while running through wine country (near Paso Robles) to make my PR for my third half.  I also hit a few walls when I ran into tendonitis in two different seasons of marathon training. As heart breaking and frustrating as that is for a runner, to be able to heal by the coast and grow stronger through it was a invaluable. Plus, whether in cross-training, in off season, or just for fun, being able to do yoga on the beach or hop on the water to SUP, kayak or ride the waves (even if you have some close calls) is a treasure that shouldn’t be overlooked.

5. Become an OC foodie expert.

“What was your favorite” is always one of the most difficult questions in life. I thought long and hard about this one when it came to the restaurants I frequented.

Watertable, Black Trumpet Bistro, and Wilmas were my top three in SoCal. Watertable was where I had my two work holiday dinner parties, and man did we eat and laugh well. Black Trumpet Bistro is a tapas style place that I brought so many of my visitors, and its unique dishes and consistent knock-it-out-of-the-park food and service made it on the must list. Wilma’s Patio – a hearty fusion between Mexican and diner – hits the nail on the head with its brunch and dinner offerings. If you know me you know I love my chocolate. So the best chocolate places in town? Susie Cakes, Ruby’s and Vitaly, for sure. Susie Cakes has a chocolate cake that rivals Wegmans' (fighting words I know). Ruby’s milkshakes always hit ANY spot, plus when you’re at the original Ruby’s at Balboa Pier, you can’t disappoint. Then there’s Vitaly, the best little Italian place in SoCal with charming Bologna owners. Their gelato is as legit as it comes, and the fondente is simply superb. The next important category would have to be fish tacos – the best cuisine of the state, hands down. Sanchos,

Sol, Wilmas (ranked again, yes), and George’s (in La Jolla) take the cake. Taco Asylum is up there too, even if they don’t have fish tacos. Last, but not least, the coffee shops: I have explored so many of OC’s finest coffee shops with my colleagues. According to our algorithm, including comfort, wifi, good coffee, atmosphere, parking, and food, the top contenders would have to be The Lost Bean, Coffee Nature, Baou (unfortunately out of business now), BLK, and probably a few of the surrounding Starbucks. You can’t quite beat working from a coffee shop!

6. Spend time with quality people.

Like it would be any place in the world, the SoCal experience is so much more if you have A+ people. So many amazing people walked into my life here, and that’s half of the reason why I’m sad to leave. Between a roommate who became my home away from home, a colleague who welcomed me into her family and taught me how to enjoy that SoCal life, one of my best friends moving out here and making sure I always chased adventure, being so close to a couple of cousins, new UR friends, and an amazing church community, I slowly realized that I was as far from lonely out here as possible. I could not be luckier than to have these new friends – who will be lifelong friends.

My job also allowed me to work with some pretty awesome people. In addition to all of that was all the visitors I had. One of the biggest perks of being in a place like SoCal is that you are officially a destination, so everyone wants to come visit! Between family and friends, there were always new adventures with my visitors. And if you live in Newport, throw parties; it makes life so much fun. Wine tasting, pasta making, 4^th of July, Memorial Day, Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Year’s Eve parties all hit new levels of high.

I’m fortunate to be leaving SoCal with so many great experiences under my belt. The past two years was a time of healing, growing, exploring, and thriving. According to my calculations, I ran approximately 2000 miles and I went to the beach about 225 times – numbers that make me proud. I was as surprised as everyone else when I made this decision to move to New York City and leave my beloved SoCal behind. This is something I have to do though; otherwise I would have always wondered. I can’t wait for this next city adventure, and who knows, maybe I’ll end up returning to Cali down the road? Either way, no doubt I’ll be back to visit! Until next time, SoCal.

Adulting is Like Kayaking - It’s Fun Until You Have to Go Upstream

Two weeks ago I was kayaking down the Oswegatchie River in the Adirondacks. It has always been an activity I love – the perfect mix of peace and exercise – especially there. As I was heading downstream, I was totally in my groove. Reflecting on life – what’s good, what’s bad, what changes I want to make – enjoying the scenery around me – the quiet and beauty of the mountains – and feeling good in my strength and ability. At some point I had to turn back, and that’s where the upstream battle commenced. I realized in that second half of the trip that this was a perfect analogy for adulting; it’s something enjoyable and worthwhile, but when you have the upstream parts you wonder why you bother at all.

I have had numerous conversations with my friends over the past few years about "adulting."  It’s a natural stage of life and development, but the combination of work, relationships, being healthy, watching finances, and whatever else individuals deem necessary in a well-rounded life is no easy equation to perfect. Especially when independence is factored in, and especially when you have high standards. So many of these pieces compare so well to my kayaking experience.

Let’s look at fitness and being healthy. It’s one of my top goals and interests in life. I’ve spent so much time in the past few years finding how I can maintain and grow my healthy lifestyle. However, whether it’s training for a marathon, or sticking with a particular dietary plan, you get to these points where you feel like you’ve hit a wall. You knew the plan, you were working on it and going somewhere. Then you get tired of training, can’t lose the remaining pounds, or you just want to eat chocolate, cheese, bread, and wine all the time instead of rabbit food.  You wonder if it’s really worth it to persevere through those questioning moments or days in order to hit the goal.

Next I would consider work. I fortunately genuinely enjoy my job. I’m ambitious and want to not just be happy but also be awesome. However, you hit phases where you don’t know how to fix the

problems, receive more difficult goals that you’re unsure of how to complete, or you’re pushed outside of your box so much that you question if it’s really what’s best. You can be going along with everything pointing in the right direction but when the tough phases come, it’s tiring and frustrating, and you wonder if you would rather do something that doesn’t make your head spin.

I also happen to be competitive and appreciate a challenge; if it was all downstream all the time, maybe it would get boring? It was while I was kayaking though that I realized that all of these different parts of adulting, all with their own type of upstream battle, are all worth the hard work to get through the tough times. They’re the times when you wonder if it’s something you still enjoy or want to do, but we can’t let the tough times chase us away from the various parts of our lives. Ultimately, they are what make us stronger. The important thing is figuring out the way to see the challenging phases as opportunities to grow. In the end, I still had a great kayaking trip. You always have to make the upstream part of the journey, unless if you just quit and have someone pick you up and drive you back…but that sounds about as lame as could be.

My Mountains Were Waiting, I Got On My Way

"Ti inamorirai ancora di piu dell’Italia quando vedrai le Dolomiti"

I was warned, it’s true, that going to the Dolomites would surely make me fall in love with Italy even more. Perhaps it’s because I adore being in the mountains and admiring nature in this beautiful world, or perhaps because it was one more region, with a completely different set of characteristics, that I had yet to discover. Whatever the reason, it definitely happened on this trip to Scena – Merano, in the Trentino Alto Adige region.

This area is not one of the first few stops for Americans visiting Italy, perhaps because Italians have worked hard to keep it a secret, or maybe because it’s difficult to get there. Some say that if it was easy -- everyone would do it. Then of course there’s the surprise that even though you’re still in Italy, German is the primary language this far north. So this time I was no longer the mysterious non-Italian who speaks the language well, but I was the non-German-speaking straniera whose speaking Italian – even though in Italy – required finding someone who could at least converse in italiano.

This trip was exactly what I was hoping for, and helped me to remember a few things that I believe are essential in living a thriving life. First, to keep a bit of spontaneity in your life, to go on an adventure without knowing precisely where you’re going or how to get there, and to trust that you’ll end up exactly where you were meant to be. Second, which is also one of the pillars that Ariana Huffington discusses in “Thrive,” to live with a sense of wonder, to take the time to appreciate the beauty of the world around. Third, to listen to yourself and take care of yourself, and to take time to just do “you.”

You have to do a bit of trekking in the Dolomites. Whether you love the challenge of the climb, or you need a bit of exercise after the gelato and pasta, or you love walking in the mountains. Before I headed out to hike, I looked up some trails and maps, picked one that looked like it went high and ended with a funicular ride, and headed out hoping I would get there. No maps and no internet accompanied by a generally good sense of direction and a strong sense of adventure were my tools. Partway through, I had no idea if I was still heading in the right direction, but I ended up on the trail I had hoped to take, huffed and puffed my way up, and could not have been happier with the destination. It was surreal, and a pleasant reminder of why I want to always pursue adventure, even if I don’t know where the difficult or winding road may lead.

As long as I remember I have loved nature. The mountains though… I am completely enchanted by the mountains. You can have the greatest workout making your way to the tops, see millions of types of plants blossoming around each corner, have viewpoints that only get more and more spectacular every bit higher you go, and then you feel that wonderful sense of accomplishment when you reach the top and have the prize of the view and the air. If you’re really lucky, you get to spend some time in the clouds too. Then to sit at the summit, or in this case to look around the little (6 buildings specifically) alpine village of Taser and wonder what life would be like there. To look out and see the other mountain tops and realize how small we are and how big and amazing this round world really is.

A lot of my reasoning to come here was to take care of myself. I knew I needed some R&R, some time to do some soul searching, and some time to listen to my own thoughts without a million others – responsibilities, people, or news – running through my brain. Plus, this area is known for its spas, and I knew that a day at the Terme di Merano would be my way to relax. Saunas, pools, Jacuzzis, the snow room (only acceptable after a steam bath), bikram yoga, not knowing nor caring about the time, and soul detoxing were among the enjoyable amenities. That and the time alone on these few days, to think about and write my lists of what I’m searching for, noting what’s still important or what changes I want to make. That’s one of my favorite parts about the slowness in Italy – take the time you need, observe the good, cry for the sad - but eventually keep going. Though I didn’t meditate - per say - on this trip, my mind feels so clear, and I feel refreshed.

Safe to say that Italy has placed one more hook in me now, and I’ve fallen even harder for this paese spetacolare. I’ll be back to the Dolomites, absolutely. I’ll strive to live with a sense of adventure, wonder, and well-being, in the time that passes before I’m lucky enough to return to the beauty dei Dolomiti. Un posto dove l’orario si ferma, l’avventura c’è sul ogni montagne e dove si puo ascoltare alla natura e a te stesso.

Andiamo per Gelato

I have, likely since day one, been a complete chocoholic. My family could tell you embarrassing and funny stories about how obnoxious I used to be about it. Then the page turned, and quality became an important factor, and then I lived in Italy for a year and a half and saw how good gelato, chocolate, and other foodie things could be. Snob or not, I have definitely scoffed over the past three years, sometimes half joking, at all Italian wannabe foods negli stati uniti.

So when I came back this time around, I was wondering if I had remembered correctly. Could gelato and the rest of the food really have been as good as I used to think? Was it still on this pedestal made of gold with splashes of diamonds all placed on the beach and surrounded by mountains, or something just as good?

Yes, yes it is. There’s a certain magic to gelato here. Especially in the summer when it’s nice and hot out. You can ask the gelato masters why it’s so much better. You’ll get various answers ranging from the ingredients, the process, the family recipes, the machines, the texture, or the Italian love. I believe they all help in making it special and diverso. However, I believe that there’s one more piece that can’t be overlooked. It’s the setting.

Eating gelato while strolling around Piazza dal Duomo, admiring the cathedral that took over 400 years to build and doesn’t have 2 of the same stones nor designs. Then meandering into La Galleria di Vittorio Emanuele and seeing all of the shops yet envisioning what this grand mall must have looked like 200 years ago when it was lit by candlelight and had a ceiling of crystal. Then to walking towards La Scala and hearing, whether actually or from memory, the beautiful notes of some of the most talented opera singers performing heart-wrenching and soul-baring operas. Then strolling down a narrow cobblestoned alley to see the stores that have been there for hundreds of years.

Or when you’re lucky it’s when you finished a delicious pasta alla carbonara lunch with the newlyweds, recovering from a 16-hour wedding day; and your best friend’s new hubby knew you had a goal of having gelato every day so he got some for lunch. And you make affogato with coffee gelato covered by the Italian espresso that also is so much better than you remembered. Looking at pictures and videos, laughing at all of the stories that continue to pour in from the day before, enjoying every second with such dear friends, loving each aspect of life and not taking anything for granted, including your soupy coffee gelato.

It could also be while you’re navigating gli navigli, enjoying the views then walking by the church and dog park you used to live near, or walking down Via Dante with the Castello behind you and Duomo in front, stopping to sit at Piazza dei Mercanti since you know the secret of that little courtyard. All the while feeling as though you never left and that as much has changed and improved just as much hasn’t changed at all and will always be this special special place.

Or perhaps it’s while you’re waiting for your train in the hectic and bustling Stazione di Centrale, with people running every which way to catch their train. Some heading off to their work city; some, like me, in no rush at all and just waiting for my binario to be announced so I can hop on the first of a 3-leg train trip to the mountains. Taking an extra minute to try to find how this gelato can be this good. Then realizing that I don’t really want to find out how, because the magic of Italy will always be the secret ingredient, it will always be what makes gelato as good as it truly is.

So yes, I have had gelato every day so far, and yes, I will continue to do so until I leave. However, I’ve also run in the mornings or walked over 25,000 steps, or danced for hours. So tutto va benissimo. Plus, it’s kind of like the sunshine tax I pay in SoCal, except it’s much less expensive and it’s just as rewarding. La maggia del gelato sará sempre quello – un po di maggia e un po della bellezza dell’Italia. Brindisi al gelato. E adesso devo prendere anche il prosecco per il brindisi. Scusatemi.